I feel useless.

I wished I could understand you a little more..

I wished I could do a little more for you before you left. 

Everything is just too late before I could react again.

I wished you never left me. From days to months and months to years. 

Time flew pass me in an blink of an eyes. 

I was counting from days to months to years and everything inside of me became too sick of it that I forget what's happiness..

Rob all my emotions now, I don't need them now. Just wanna feel numb all inside out. 

I wished I never knew you, just perhaps things would turn out different. 

Why did you leave me so many memories to reminisced. 

It hurts painfully like a cut in your heart. 

It's able to stitch the wound and stop the pain but there's still the after effect. 

I have no idea why, why am I still stuck to the past when everyone, everything have moved on. 

I just know, I'm tired. I'm sick. I'm sad. 

Family, Friends, Lovers, Crush, Strangers.

I have no idea how I should put this, but I know this isn't the life I want to lead.

This isn't the role I should be playing in my own story, my own movie. 

I wonder how will my past looked at me. How will I be judge from the past to the present. 

Should I feel more glorious? Or rather will I feel more sad. 

I have no idea. Really clueless. I really wished I could step out of my body to take a good look at myself. 

I wanna see how I really behave react and everything. How does people look at me. 

Do I act sluttish? Or am I just an ordinary girl. Or someone whose nice? 

I really wanna judge for myself. The past me and now. 

Well, I'm really curious. Well, so much said for the night. I shall grab some sleep need to fight a battle tmr. Goodnight world